Reasons People are Undecided about the 2012 Presidential Election

1. Not sure if Obama's constant use of the word "folks" is folksy enough.

2. Not sure if Romney is willing to define rape as being between one man and one woman.

3. Not sure if Obama is going to release his dental records.

4. Not sure if Romney's orange spray tan was meant to court Latinos 

or those hopelessly entrenched in a GTL cycle.

5. Not sure if Obama's middle name is still a thing to be mad about. 

6. Not sure if Romney eats human food. 

7. Not sure if Obamacare covers forced ultrasounds.

8. Not sure if "Paul Ryan" is a palindrome for "Mitt Romney".

9. Not sure if Biden is Obama's friend or drunk uncle or what.

10. Not sure if Romney's 2 trillion dollar defense budget increase proposal is to show-off 

or if he plans on starting cool new war. 

Post Script: 

"To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked. I mean, really, what’s to be confused about?" ...

..."I wonder if, in the end, the undecideds aren’t the biggest pessimists of all. Here they could order the airline chicken, but, then again, hmm. 'Isn’t that adding an extra step?' they ask themselves. 'If it’s all going to be chewed up and swallowed, why not cut to the chase, and go with the platter of shit?' Ah, though, that’s where the broken glass comes in." -David Sedaris, The New Yorker, 2008